The most recent contact has been from a man whom I knew 14 years ago and who lives in another country. These messages throw me into an emotional turmoil because, as I said, I would like to be in a serious relationship. I may get pancreatic cancer and be gone before I’m 50. Decline contact with your exes, start with a clean slate, and trust that the right guy – the one who will be with you ‘til the day you die – is not going to dump you the way these other 3 men did. Try to find a way to ignore these types of overtures.I don’t understand what the point is of contacting someone from so long ago in your past, especially when you no longer even live in the same city or country. When I hear from these men, I begin to remember our relationship and wonder if it would be possible to get together again. I think all of these things are exceedingly unlikely, but they’re possible. And now that his life is not where he wants it to be… now that he’s going through his mid-life crisis and can’t seem to pull off hitting on 29-year-olds in bars… If nothing else, they showed that they had poor judgement when they broke up with a terrific woman like you, right?The first time around, they had a lot in common, but there'd been zero element of romance and, as Lucy told Mic, "I didn't feel loved by him in that sense. "We were both exploring other social options and dating other people and telling each other about it to varying levels of semi-jealousy.There was no, 'You're so beautiful.' It was not a person I saw as the father of my children." The couple split for a little over a year, a time in which they remained distant friends. I had some experiences that made me feel much more sexually curious than I ever had during that initial relationship." When they did get back together, Lucy credited a "physical spark" that hadn't been there the first time but become evident upon reuniting.
We had a mutual breakup so there were no bad feelings between us.She has no current boyfriend and I’m just out of a two year relationship. I get the feeling she now sees me only as a friend and may be I feel that about her too — just not sure.In your work, have you really seen relationships been restored after break up?Despite the many heartening things I said above, which may sway you to think that you may want to give one of your exes a shot, I’m still skeptical. It’s not that it’s impossible for people, through life experience and therapy, to improve on various facets of their life – it’s that it’s a pretty risky crapshoot to consider that the disappointing man in your past has suddenly morphed himself into someone consistent and trustworthy. Because even though people regret, change, and evolve, at the end of the day, there are some things that don’t change. In my opinion, once it’s over, it’s over, and I move on with my life. He’s just a lot weaker and needier right now, because of his circumstances.Yet I have been contacted by a number of ex-boyfriends (three in the past three years alone) telling me how they regret breaking up with me, how still love me and miss me, and how they wish they could have another chance. Listen, I know why it might be tempting to rekindle an old flame with the devil that you know, but I’d strongly lean towards the one you don’t know.Yangki’s Answer: YES, I’ve seen two people get back together after a break-up.I have seen hundreds of dating and formerly married couples get back after along period of time a part.According to counselling service Relate, one in four divorcees regrets their split. For some, the very idea will seem impossible — but for others it is a secret longing they can hardly admit even to themselves. He had such a clever way with words and he made me laugh.Victoria Craig, 66, runs a knitwear company and lives with her husband Nicholas, 67, a retired solicitor, in Corbridge, Northumberland. That night at the wedding, we talked until the early hours, and a couple of weeks later he rang to ask me out.